SpiritSong
High-Conflict Divorce and Co-Parent Coaching

The parallels between what’s happening in our nation and what happens to victims of abuse in family court are stark.

Minimization slowly erodes your confidence in perceiving what’s happening to and around you. For victims of coercive control, it often happens in private, with no one else around to validate your experience.

Over time, invalidation conditions you to silence yourself, doubt yourself, or even apologize for having feelings. It slowly erodes your ability to trust your own instincts and may even leave you asking yourself if you really are going crazy.

“He was ‘just joking.’ He was ‘just teasing.’ He was ‘just stressed.’ But the truth? He was dismissing you. And dismissiveness is never harmless—it’s a tool of control.”

Do the work to identify your own core wounds and heal the version of you that ended up in the abusive relationship in the first place.

He doesn't value you. You told him what you needed and he told you that you were wrong. Silly. Your kids are watching all of this.

You're never special to a narcissist. You're a tool. And if you think you're going to be rewarded for loyalty, you're also a fool. You were fooled, Sarah, and you've made a fool of the people who voted for you.

The bottom line is that our patriarchal society was built on selling codependency as a virtue.

The truth is I've been struggling as well. The collision of this second term with other big traumas, triggers, and life events has me altern

Anything that ends with "with a narcissist" is liable to be triggering for anyone who's been in a relationship with someone who has...

I've done a lot of work to heal myself over the last 8 years. Specifically that means understanding the generational trauma that I've...

The current state of political affairs in the United States has me a little shook lately. It's a replay of 2016 to some extent, but I've...

Baggage. We all have it. But I hadn’t really stopped to think about what that looks like until recently when I started being confronted...

You feel like you're losing your kids to your abuser and you don't understand why they are behaving and responding to you in ways that...

I sat down to work on some TikTok content the other day and had one of those life affirming moments of clarity. In the midst of...

If you've been in the narcissistic abuse world long enough, you know what a flying monkey is. It's the narcissist's circle of loyalists...

This is a tough one for me. I have spent the better part of the last eight years doing the heavy lifting of healing from cptsd and...

Sigh. I've had to do a lot of coaching myself in the last 48 hours--radical acceptance, circle of control, breathe in...healing means...

Dominance. That's their agenda. A quick Google for synonyms for the word dominant brings up ruling, governing, controlling, commanding, supr

Hindsight can be a real bitch. Looking back you can see so clearly how things played out. You can see the moments where you said "This...